Welcome to Mommy (and Daddy) Lingo!

Hi and thanks for visiting this site. As a mother of 3 I've said some pretty odd stuff over these past 10 years and thought it would be fun to write a bunch of them down.



And now, with the encouragement of my brother, I'd like to share some of these unconventional, yet practical, phrases. Enjoy!


Tuesday, July 31, 2012

"Well...you can blow and suck."

Ooh, you could just feel the pain in his voice as my husband said these words to our daughter the other day. And the anguished look on his face afterwards screamed out, "I didn't want to say that! I didn't! I feel dirty now." I hadn't really been paying attention to what they were doing - I was busy going through boxes in the garage looking for yard sale items. I happened across a folder full of old papers from college and was, at the moment when I heard the words no parent ever wants to hear uttered to their child, engrossed in an essay analyzing the underlying meaning behind the short story by Samuel Clemens entitled, "The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County." Riveting. Anyway, I knew my husband had just found his old harmonica - I heard its lovely melody in the background - so I knew that what he said he must have said out of pure necessity and explanation. (although, i must admit, it took me a good 2 seconds to sort out in my head why he was saying such things). So I did what any good wife should do in that type of situation, I laughed. And then I nodded my head, assuring him that he was not, indeed, a pervert, just a good dad trying to explain in easy-to-understand kid terms how to play a harmonica.

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

"How did lettuce get on your head?"

An innocent question, although I knew there really was no answer. Questions like that come out of my mouth all the time. Honestly, I should certainly know better. But to my defense, we were sitting here, at an airport restaurant waiting for our delayed flight to materialize, when it just slipped out. By the way, we're still here, at the airport, now waiting to see just how much longer our flight can can be detained. We're at about 2.5 hours now, which puts us arriving approximately 72 minutes after our connecting flight leaves. Hmm. Good thing we're in no hurry to get home. No work tomorrow and we've been relaxing in the Bahamas for the past 10 days and are still on 'island time.' No complaints here, believe me. I'll just sit back and wait. And hope the kids remain as laid back as they are now for the next 12 hours, or however long it takes to walk through our front door.